A quick poll

I’ve been thinking about a good friend of mine who’s currently a high school senior. She made friends with a girl in one of her classes. This girl was obviously an outcast, and obviously unhappy. My friend decided she could use a friend, and made an effort to reach out to her. She talked with her, she listened to her, and they struck up a genuine friendship.

Then, people started telling my friend that the other girl was lesbian, and had a crush on her. My friend, who has no inclination that way, told these other people it was none of their business. She said if the other girl felt that way, then that was between them and no one else. She wasn’t going to stop being her friend just because a bunch of gossips decided to butt in. She stuck up for her friend, and chose to remain her friend, even though she doesn’t  believe that homosexuality is a good choice.

So in this situation, who’s the bigot? My friend, who would never vote in favor of legalizing gay marriage but chose to treat this girl kindly regardless of her sexual orientation? Or the other teens, who tried to drive a wedge between them, who ostracized the poor girl in the first place, but who might choose to vote for gay marriage? Isn’t it the way we choose to treat people that should matter?

Now, I’m curious about something. Who here thinks that by legalizing gay marriage, suddenly people who are homophobic won’t be any more? If those teens voted for gay marriage, would that redeem them from their day to day hateful behavior? If my friend voted against it, would that undo all the good she’s done in this girl’s life?

(And in case you are wondering, the situation I presented is real. It’s not about me, and it really is about a close friend of mine. I didn’t want to use her name, to preserve her privacy.)

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Published in: on April 15, 2009 at 1:45 pm  Leave a Comment  
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